True Confessions

It's Tuesday, so that means it's time for true confessions. I have lots to confess. But, I won't make excuses. It's been a rough couple of weeks. I've said that before. It's time to move on from there. Here's the bad news.......

1. Workouts were almost nonexistant. I can remember only doing two.

2. My food was almost all eaten in restaraunts. I admit that some of it was really good and I enjoyed it. Who wouldn't enjoy homemade Polish food?

3. Alcohol was not my friend. No wait, I think it was my friend, way too much.

4. I totally screwed up on the diet coke/water ratio.

Here is the good news......the pity party is over. I can feel the funk lifting. I am back on track and it starts at 5:30 a.m. tomorrow morning with the Biggest Loser wii game. I just got done watching the Biggest Loser and it inspired me. I am the only person who can do this for me. Just me and I can do this. Yay Me!

The Monday Project/Motivation Wall

This weeks Monday Project was to make a motivation wall. The things that push us and our goals for this challenge. Mine is pretty simple and straight forward because that's just the kind of girl I am.

This is the whole wall. It is hard to read like this, so I broke it down into halves. You can also click on the picture to make it bigger.

This is the top half. My grandkids are my biggest motivation. I want to be able to keep up with them and the older they get, the faster they are going to get. My next 5k is a biggie. It is March 13th and I am bound and determined that I am going to run the whole thing without my ankle or knee giving me any problems. I would have loved to do the mini marathon in San Diego, but I had to be a realistic. If I haven't been able to run a whole 5k, how am I going to do more than four times that and keep up with my wonderful sisters who are 20 and 30 years younger than me? I'm not going to hold anyone else back. I tried to get my friend from home to come with me, but she couldn't. We would have been a good team, alternating running and walking. She is the friend that I walked the Indy mini with before.

This is the bottom half. It includes my goals, me running the last 5k, my wii games and the picture of my big old butt. It usually is on my fridge and it says "Nothing tastes as good as being thinner feels!".

That is my motivation wall. I'm going to put it in my computer room because that is where I workout and spend a lot of time. I've had a rough couple of weeks and have been looking for my motivation Guess what? I found it right here. Thank you for the assignment sisters. After today, I think I will be right back on track. No, I know that I am back on track!!

Come Out Come Out Wherever You Are

This is your time. The time to make your presence known. It's Delurker Day. For all of the visitors who visit and don't comment, this is your day. Say hi. I'd love to hear from you. I know you are out there. I have proof.

Erin wrote a post that talked about analytics. I had never heard of it and emailed her to ask about it. It's a Google program that tracks the visits and visitors to your site. I downloaded the program on the evening of January 7th. Since then, I have had 344 visitors and only 46 comments. Like I said, I know you are out there.

If you please, make this a happy "delurker" day for me. Leave me a comment, even if you just say hi.

You Capture/Your Winter

My winter has been cold and icy.

This first picture is my favorite. It took many shots until I got the one with the drip.

There are lots of cool icicle formations.

Picnic anyone?

We are nice enough to feed the birds daily and they have the nerve to be picky about what they will eat. Notice the seed they are pushing away?

Lastly, look at this poor little guy trying to hold his ground in the winds.

That's what I got out of my fifty or so shots. Go to Beth's and see what everyone else got.

True Confessions Tuesday

Grumpy, crabby, depressed, totally a bitch. Yep, that about sums it up. Are you getting the impression that this was a bad week? Bad doesn't even begin to describe it......

1. I just booked a hotel for my third funeral in two weeks. Two friends lost their mothers and now another lost her dad. I've been so depressed, all I've done is eat bad things and drink bad things.

2. My husband is driving me nuts. Totally freakin nuts.

3. I've only exercised twice this week. At least one of them was the Biggest Loser for the wii and Bob tried to kill me with the last chance workout. Have I mentioned that I love this wii game?

4. Although I have planned my meals for the week, I've hardly been home to cook them.

5. I've taken care of everyone but me this week.

6. Have you heard enough?

If confession is good for the soul, I should be snapping out of this funk very soon. One can hope!

Project Me

Homework. It's been a long time since people expected me to do homework. That is until last week. These sisters of mine are tough. This weeks assignment is to look back at our year. What worked and what didn't in our weight loss/fitness journey. That is a huge thing to think about. So many things to sort through. This could take pages and pages, if you wanted to really do the assignment justice. I'm going to try to keep it managable, but still make it real with no lying or fudging on facts.

Let's start with body image, where mine comes from. Not to pass the buck, but a lot of mine comes from my sister. She is thin, always has been. She doesn't have to work at it at all. The problem is that she constantly talks about peoples bodies. She has been doing this for as long as I can remember. A long time. She comments all the time about if people are fat, skinny, whatever. I don't think she even knows she does it. I don't think she does it to be cruel. I hope she doesn't do it intentionally to make me feel like crap because if she is, it's always had the negative effect. I've always said, "she can't tell me what to do, people like me just like I am". Maybe other people did, but the bottom line is that I didn't like me. It took me a long time to realize that, but I finally did.

I finally had the aha moment when I looked in the mirror and said "this is crazy, I look like crap, I feel like crap, but what do I do and how do I start?". The hard part started. It took me a long time and a lot of starts and stops before I really thought I could do this. I think you all know what I am going to say next. The Sisterhood was my saving grace. I don't pretend that I have it all together yet. I'm a true work in progress, but I know I can do this. You helped me realize that and I can never thank you enough. In June when I received the first Sister Spotlight award, I knew that I was going to do this because I would never want to disappoint my sisters when they put that faith in me. It was another aha moment, so to speak.

What I did that worked for me in 2009.....

1. I packed my lunch for work. No more eating out and eating crap. The wonderful thing about that is that now if I eat fast food, it literally makes me sick. My stomache can't take it anymore. I think that is great!

2. I planned the time of day that I would work out. If I didn't, I always had excuses of why I couldn't fit it in. I always do it first thing in the morning. I'm fresh and ready to go. I have also started doing the treadmill at night while I watch something on tv.

3. I've learned that water is my friend.

4. I believe in my myself that I can do this. If I fall off the wagon (like last week), I know that I can get right back on. Before I would throw my arms up and just give up completely. Not now!

5. I gave myself the power to choose if I want to mess up. If we go out for dinner and I want to have a cocktail or two, I'll do it. I just know that I have to make that up somewhere the next day.

6. I've only been doing it a short time, but planning my meals a week in advance has been a lifesaver. Why didn't I think of that sooner?

What I did that didn't work in 2009.....

1. Sitting on my butt when I could have been working out. I did that lots of days.

2. Letting other people lead me astray.

3. Saying "just one won't hurt" because it will.

4. Believing there were things I couldn't do.

5. Getting mad at myself and falling into old patterns.

I am excited about 2010. I have grandkids to chase with a new one due in April. I want to be the fun grandma who can run and play on the swings and in the pool. I won't be the fat, winded old lady. Not now, not ever. I'm taking the time for me. It's a new concept for me because I have always been the person who does for everyone else first. I always put myself last. I'm still the same person who will always do for others, but I can also do something for me and not feel guilty about it.

If we do this homework in January of 2011, I'll be very excited. It will be a great post complete with pictures. Just you wait and see!

You Capture/2009

I didn't have a lot of time this past week to really work on this. I just picked a picture from each month. Hope that is okay. Here we go...

January

Dad and his girls.

February
My husband sent me flowers for Valentines day being he was in Florida. It was very special.
It is something he does very rarely.

March
We got to take a trip to the Smokeys for spring break. This is one of the waterfalls we hiked to.

April

I did the Walk for Babies with Team James and Jake. I loved everything about it, especially meeting some bloggers I had grown to love.

May
One of my good friends died several years ago. Her only daughter got married. I love her like one of my own. This is my sweetie dancing at the reception.

June
Just one of the cutest pictures I took that month of my sweet granddaughter. She is just about as cute as they come.

July

I was able to fulfill a lifelong dream and go to a Cubs game. Our seats were fantastic and I loved every minute of the day. I didn't even care that it rained and they lost.

August
We had a tornado. Scary, but mesmerizing. It was very hard to stop watching the funnel cloud and get in the house to safety.

September

Fun in the pool that scared the crap out of grammy.

October
A very fun day at the orchard.

November
The annual Christmas card picture always taken on Thanksgiving.

December

My little angels in their matching jammies.

So, that's it. Head over to Beth's and check out what everyone else picked.

True Confession Tuesday

I not only fell off the wagon since weigh in, I let the wagon run right over me. I have a reason, but it is certainly no excuse. One of my very best friends mom died unexpectedly on Thursday. She fell on Wednesday and hit her head and there was nothing they could do. So, I spent my time with the family. And....

1. I cooked
2. I ate
3. I ate some more
4. I drank
5. I drank some more
6. Exercise never even crossed my mind

Today was the funeral. Things will calm down now and get back to normal. I'm not looking forward to weigh in tomorrow. I'll just be posting that in the comments. I promise I will do better next week. It certainly has to be better than this week!

My Inspirations for 2010

In just a few weeks, I will have been blogging for one year. I never could have conceived back then what blogging would come to mean to me. I didn't know that I would "meet" so many wonderful people or that I would come to care about them all so much. We share our joys, sorrows, highs and lows. We love seeing pictures of each others children and grandchildren. They make me accountable for my weight loss goals. These people inspire me daily. But....there are two very special blogging friends who I don't know how I've lived without all these years.

First, there is Rhonda. Believe it or not, we live less than 15 miles away from each other. Needless to say, we have met in person. She holds a full time job. She is a wonderful wife and mother and a very doting mimi. She is on the same weight loss/healthy lifestyle journey that I am on and she is doing so good at it. She is a total inspiration to me.

Second, there is Sharon. Unfortunately, we have not met in person. She lives on the east coast. I don't remember how we actually found each other, but I sure am glad we did. Nobody leaves a comment on a post like Sharon. Nobody writes on their blog like she does either. She brings tears to my eyes so often. She turned 57 a few months ago and has begun her 57 in 52. A few of her 57 so far have been skydiving, pole dancing, ice skating at Rockefeller Center and writing a childrens book. Needless to say, my inspiration.

Lastly, someday, someway, sometime, the three of us are going to be in the same place at the same time and we are going to have one hell of a time together. I love you girls!! Thank you for being my friends.

The Thursday Three/Homework

Today is the first Thursday in the new challenge at the Sisterhood. Our first homework assignment is to set three goals we have for this challenge. We are not allowed to use the words "I won't" or "try". After much thought, here are my three goals for the next seven weeks.....

1. I will plan my meals for the week and make a grocery list. No more coming home from work and saying, "What the heck are we going to have for dinner?".

2. I will work out no less than five days a week. I will do the EA Sports Active More Workouts, Biggest Loser, Jillian Michaels Fitness Ultimatum 2010 or the Shred before I go to work. I will go on the treadmill at night.

3. I will drink two waters for every diet coke I drink.

I will track my progress on these goals on a calendar.

My non food reward at the end of the challenge, if I accomplish these goals will be a new shirt from One More Mile.

That is all for now. Wish me luck!!

p.s. I am not a total moron. There are spaces between the goals when I look at it before I hit publish post and then when I post it, they are gone. Bad blogger. Now that I have written this, it will probably post fine on the 37th try.